Got that last stubborn 50 pounds to lose? Tried pre-packaged food diets? Been eating like your ancestors? How about drinking some disgusting concoction that sees you on the toilet for hours on end? Have all of those failed miserably?
I feel your pain and have the solution, providing you, like me, have a loss of appetite that accompanies your heartbreak. Get dumped. Yes, you read that right, get yourself dumped from a meaningful relationship. I am still reeling and don't understand all the things that I did to lead to my breakup (though I admit some of the problems were mine), but it has done wonders for my weight-loss woes. First, this has to be a meaningful relationship. I had been with my ex for four years. Anything under a year and it's not going to be meaningful enough to help you lose weight. If you think you have a meaningful relationship after six weeks, you have bigger problems than needing to lose weight. So have you been in a meaningful relationship and want to lose weight? Great, get dumped. Second, now you are dumped from your meaningful relationship, you are going to feel like crap. If you don't, then the relationship wasn't meaningful and the dumped diet isn't going to help you lose weight. Now, watch the pounds drop because if you were like me in a meaningful relationship and react with a lack of appetite, this breakup is doing to zap your appetite better than any wonder drug or supplement. It won't be fun and your friends and family will get annoyed when they take you out to cheer you up and you move that $50 steak around hoping it will trick them into thinking you are eating without taking more than a bite, but the pounds will start dropping. How long can you be on this diet? Well that depends on you. It's closing in a year now, and I confess some of my appetite has returned, but most times, I cram down as much as I can to avoid the stink eye from others who wonder what the hell is wrong with me. Look for the full length book version of the dumped diet with plans on how to develop a meaningful relationship, how to get dumped and how to make the diet work for you coming soon. Keep in mind, as with all diet plans, individual results may vary. (Note: this is a tongue-in-cheek humor piece and not meant to be any actual diet plan. So if you have read this believing it is an actual diet plan, please do not try. Have a laugh, I'm not a doctor and not offering health advice, just offering you a laugh and my misery.) Miranda N. Prather
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